Archive for the ‘ Weird ’ Category

OMG FEEL LOST

OMG, I fell asleep at 9 and woke up at 6 and now I’m lost and confused.  No one is up except me, I don’t know what to do.

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Dream

There was this giant centipede on the wall and it was spinning round and round until it turned into a ball.  There was also a giant spider.  It was fighting this mutant thing.  Then I saw the past — me and the spider used to be friends.  They were so huge, they were up to my knees.  O_____O

Weird or no?

Service Water?

Drive-Thru:  Will that complete your order ma’am?

Katie: Could I also have 3 service waters?

Drive-Thru:  Could you repeat that?

Katie:  3 service waters

Drive-Thru:  What was that?

Katie:  3 service waters

Drive-Thru (new person):  Excuse me?

Katie: 3 service waters

-long pause-

Drive-Thru:  That was 3 Citrus Mojo Platters?

Katie:  No, 3 service waters!

-long pause-

Drive-Thru:  Pull up to the front please

-drive up to the window-

Server:  Sorry, I couldn’t understand you, what was that?

Katie:  Could I have 3 service waters?

Server:  Repeat that?

Katie:  3 service waters

Server:  What kind of platters?

Katie:  No, 3 service waters

-blank stare-

Katie:  3 waters

Server:  OH, water!  Sure, no problem

(mumblings in the back “what did she want?” “3 waters”)

-drive off with 3 service waters-

“Service” water theories

What exactly is this “service” water?  Is it something different from “water” water?  Why was the katie so determined to drink this “service water” as opposed to regular water?  Let’s speculate.

Vocabulary Theory – There is no such thing as “service” water.  The katie, being illiterate,  just mistook it for one of these ACTUAL words:

Shower water

Surfer water

Surface water

Safer water

Sewer water

Citrus Mojo Platters

Huang Theory – 3 “servings” of water

Fetch Theory  The term “service water” does not yet exist, but the katie, being unpopular, wants it to become a term so she can then claim credit for coming up with the term, thus becoming popular.

Nuclear Power Plant Service Water Systems Theory – After googling “service water”, the first search result was of Nuclear Power Plant Service Water Systems.  According to this theory, “service water” DOES indeed exist, but as a shorthand for another term.  In this case, it would be referring to the Service Water Systems at any nuclear power plant which is often referred to as “service water”.  If this is actually what the katie was referring to, then the katie would NOT be illiterate at all!

But this theory does lead us into another conundrum: why was the katie wanting to drink nuclear power plant water systems?  It may be possible to EAT nuclear power plant water systems, but to DRINK something that is partially solid and quite massive seems dangerous, if not impossible.  Therefore, we must continue to look for answers.

Mikachu Theory – The katie is ordering service water, in this case service water referring to radioactive water from nuclear power plants, in order to swallow radioactive material.  This will give it super powers so one day it can save the earth.  Although it is likely that the katie would want to get super powers so it can stand out, this theory has one very big hole in it.  The katie would never want to save the world!  Perhaps destroy the world?

 Willard Theory – AsI continued my search on google for the illusive “service water”, I came across an ACTUAL definition for it!

Service water is an oft neglected necessity on hydraulic dredges.  It is one of a number of vital components required to assure efficient and trouble-free dredge operation.

The website’s provided PowerPoint also included several uses for service waters.

“Service water at sufficient volume and pressure is used to:”

  • Lubricate the dredge pump shaft in the packing gland.
  • Cool the pump shaft sleeve and packing.
  • Seal the gap between the pump shaft sleeve and packing.
  • Flush solids out of the gap between the bearing side plate and impeller.
  • Flush abrasive particles out of the rotary cutterhead marine bearings.
  • Flush and lubricates lineshaft marine bearings.
  • Cool hydraulic oil.
  • Cool the engine coolant.
  • Jet loose material near the suction inlet.
  • Jet wash down high banks of material.
  • Drink.

Surprisingly, the last use for service water listed in the bullets was not originally included in the website!  I have taken the liberty to include it there myself because obviously Willard’s list is incomplete.  Service water is very much so used for drinking, as was demonstrated by the katie, who was very eager to drink it.

So, there we have it.  I believe that out of the discussed theories, the last theory, Willard’s Theory, is most likely the correct theory.  Why would the katie be asking for something that does not actually exist?  This does not make sense at all, so we must accept Willard’s Theory, which gives a definition for service water, therefore establishing its existence.

As the demand for service water grows (because hydraulic dredging is becoming a popular pastime for preteens), this term will become more commonplace, so I suggest that you familiarize yourself with this term now as you will need it in the future.

Weirdness

When you read my last blog which of the images do you see?

OR

Weird Day

Today I passed by this popular bar that I’ve never been inside before and I decided that maybe I should check it out.  Well, I went inside and saw Andy there.  OMG was he drunk!  So, yeah, I went up to him and I slapped him.  I’m not quite sure why, but at the time it seemed like a good idea.  He was too drunk to notice that I slapped him, so I slapped him harder.  Thinking back, I shouldn’t have done that because it ended up making a really loud noise and it made everyone in the bar stare at me.

I tried to avoid the awkwardness by sneaking out of the bar, but before I could exit, I heard a husky Irish accent yelling at me to come back.  When I turned around, I saw Ail there in the weirdest dress ever.  Ail was all, “Why are you slapping my hubby!”  My jaw dropped of course.  I mean, like, he always has some pretty strange dresses, but this one was something even Lady Gaga wouldn’t wear.  I didn’t have time to ask him about it though because next thing I knew, he took out a BB gun and started shooting gumballs at me.

I ran out of the bar but all the gumballs that hit me made me look like a spotted cheetah.  Yes, the gumballs were that big, ok.  Ail was still chasing after me, so I hid inside a nearby bush.  Well, I ended up accidentally stepping on someone’s hand or something because I heard a loud yell.  When I turned around to see what it was, it was Miyu peeing in the bushes.  It was awkward for both of us, so I just waved hello and slowly moved out.

As soon as I stepped out of the bushes, I found myself tangled in a net.  Right next to me was Katie in a strange safari outfit jumping up and down and cheering that she finally caught a jaguar.  Of course I corrected her and told her that I’m closer to a cheetah, but she wouldn’t listen.  She took out a pokeball from her pocket and insisted that I hopped inside.  I told her that it was impossible because the ball was so small, but she decided that it would be best if she cremated me first then put me inside.  I agreed and told her to find a burner, so she went off to look for the oven.

I waited a couple of hours for her before I gave up and decided to walk away.  I guess I forgot that I still had a net over me and ended up tripping someone with it.  It turned out to be Carebear!  I helped her up and she helped cut me out of the net.  She’s always so sweet! She gave me a pretty Scooby Doo sticker to put on my forehead too.

I hadn’t realized that it was already 8 pm and it was getting dark out.  The light from a nearby building looked safer than the dark outside, so I slipped inside.  Well, the place looked familiar, kind of, yeah like the bar I had been in earlier.  I went to sit down at the bar to just rest my head.  A couple of minutes later, a tap on the shoulder woke me up.  I looked up to see Andy, but wasn’t fast enough to avoid his slap on my face.  That bastard walked off with my Scooby Doo sticker.  What a weird day.